Tuesday, August 24, 2004
My current piece of mind!
I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everyone.
This phrase sometimes hits me right in the center of my heart. I guess that's what I've been doing for past couple of years in my life.
I fairly remember when I was in class 11th, preparing for IIT-JEE ... my bhaiya was once sick and my mom asked me to get medicine for him from the closeby market. I rudely escaped the 15 min work on the pretext that I'd be late for my class. To think about it now, I really wonder how indifferent I was to just anyone's feelings, even of my bhaiya!!!
And to think of the situation now, I've become indifferent to my own discomfort at most of the times when the people I "care" for are concerned. HeHe ... even putting the word "care" in quotes is very subjective in my life, because I, with my head shamelessly erect, confess that I do not know who all do I care for, and for that matter ... what does "care" actually mean!
Day before yesterday I was actually planning to make a list of the ppl who I actually care for ... Lol ... ! No wonder, I slept in the mid-way. But that was kind of an eye-opener. Coz, I guess when the condition is that you've to think whether u care for some person or not, there's no point putting that person in the list of the "cared" ppl.
Someone sometime back had told me ... "When it happens, you don't have to ask if it's that." The context may be a little different, but eventually it shows u a way to take life in a stride, rather than pondering over the same things again and again, and eventually being left with no solution.
Still at this point of time, the thoughts seem to be all mixed up ... and the very idea I'd kept in my mind when I started to putup my piece of mind here seems to be well-lost. All I can think of doing is, being a l'il dependent on my decisions in life. Afterall, there's something called intuition, which shows u the way when you're stuck in a labyrinth with no way out.
Anyways, this brings to my favorite topic of discussion now-a-days ...
Yeah! Yeah! My trips to Ahmedabad ... Lolollol!
I really wonder at times what lies beneath. I really wonder at times, she's one person with whom I don't have to think about anything. Ppl who know both of us talk all non-sensical things. But I guess it's the first time, when I don't give a "DAMN" to what they say. U just "know" when u click with some person. Some trivias make your moves just too swift.
At times, you just don't have to ask the other person, you just "know" what's going on in her mind. At times, you speak the same sentence, with the same words, with the same "namak-mirchi" in it, just at the same time when it's least expected. At times, when u'r going to find her at her place at an odd time, she seems to be coming out at that very moment. At times, her thoughts make you laugh out loud. At times, u crack PJs with her, just to make her laugh. At times, u call her up, just to listen to her laughter. At times, when u irritate her, just to end her un-ending fight against not-giving-up with her bubbly nature. At times, when her getting emotional seems to be one thing of utmost concern to u. And above all ... when u know that u'r not "flat" on her ... [What a rowdy language naa ... lol]
Eventually, when ppl compell me to "think" about her ... the only thot that comes to my mind is - the only desire is - to enjoy that comfort level in the relationship, that she can come to me at any point in life and share her tini-miniest of experiences, that she dosen't have to "think" before coming to talk to me, that most importantly ... she doesn't have to "think" about me ... Lol!
Hufff ... !! Seems easy in saying, but it's a work requiring utmost responsibilities.
And I feel proud in declaring, I don't have to "think" whether I'm responsible enuf :-)
This phrase sometimes hits me right in the center of my heart. I guess that's what I've been doing for past couple of years in my life.
I fairly remember when I was in class 11th, preparing for IIT-JEE ... my bhaiya was once sick and my mom asked me to get medicine for him from the closeby market. I rudely escaped the 15 min work on the pretext that I'd be late for my class. To think about it now, I really wonder how indifferent I was to just anyone's feelings, even of my bhaiya!!!
And to think of the situation now, I've become indifferent to my own discomfort at most of the times when the people I "care" for are concerned. HeHe ... even putting the word "care" in quotes is very subjective in my life, because I, with my head shamelessly erect, confess that I do not know who all do I care for, and for that matter ... what does "care" actually mean!
Day before yesterday I was actually planning to make a list of the ppl who I actually care for ... Lol ... ! No wonder, I slept in the mid-way. But that was kind of an eye-opener. Coz, I guess when the condition is that you've to think whether u care for some person or not, there's no point putting that person in the list of the "cared" ppl.
Someone sometime back had told me ... "When it happens, you don't have to ask if it's that." The context may be a little different, but eventually it shows u a way to take life in a stride, rather than pondering over the same things again and again, and eventually being left with no solution.
Still at this point of time, the thoughts seem to be all mixed up ... and the very idea I'd kept in my mind when I started to putup my piece of mind here seems to be well-lost. All I can think of doing is, being a l'il dependent on my decisions in life. Afterall, there's something called intuition, which shows u the way when you're stuck in a labyrinth with no way out.
Anyways, this brings to my favorite topic of discussion now-a-days ...
Yeah! Yeah! My trips to Ahmedabad ... Lolollol!
I really wonder at times what lies beneath. I really wonder at times, she's one person with whom I don't have to think about anything. Ppl who know both of us talk all non-sensical things. But I guess it's the first time, when I don't give a "DAMN" to what they say. U just "know" when u click with some person. Some trivias make your moves just too swift.
At times, you just don't have to ask the other person, you just "know" what's going on in her mind. At times, you speak the same sentence, with the same words, with the same "namak-mirchi" in it, just at the same time when it's least expected. At times, when u'r going to find her at her place at an odd time, she seems to be coming out at that very moment. At times, her thoughts make you laugh out loud. At times, u crack PJs with her, just to make her laugh. At times, u call her up, just to listen to her laughter. At times, when u irritate her, just to end her un-ending fight against not-giving-up with her bubbly nature. At times, when her getting emotional seems to be one thing of utmost concern to u. And above all ... when u know that u'r not "flat" on her ... [What a rowdy language naa ... lol]
Eventually, when ppl compell me to "think" about her ... the only thot that comes to my mind is - the only desire is - to enjoy that comfort level in the relationship, that she can come to me at any point in life and share her tini-miniest of experiences, that she dosen't have to "think" before coming to talk to me, that most importantly ... she doesn't have to "think" about me ... Lol!
Hufff ... !! Seems easy in saying, but it's a work requiring utmost responsibilities.
And I feel proud in declaring, I don't have to "think" whether I'm responsible enuf :-)
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